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Who Has Affairs - and Why?
The Grass Isn't Greener
To Tell or not To Tell
Confronting an Affair
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The Third Party
"Loaded" Words and Affairs
Key to Personal Recovery
Rebuild Trust after an Affair
Recover "Love Feelings"
Online Affairs-It's Cheating
Get Her Out of His Life
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Unfaithful Girlfriend

 

 

 

 

 

 

extramarital affair advice

Survive an Affair - Extramarital Affair Advice: 

The "Other Woman" or "Other Man"

 


It's understandable that the third party becomes the target for a lot of the anger and rage people feel. This is in keeping with the general attitude in society that sees the third party as responsible for much of the misery brought about by an affair. While it's tempting to believe that if it hadn't been for some particular third party, then an affair wouldn't have happened at all―that's not necessarily true. It's more likely that it just means it would have been a "different" third party. 

It may be that obsessing on any particular person gives them far more importance than they deserve. While we have been quick to condemn and criticize the third party, we've also tended to have an exaggerated image of them as a femme fatale or a Don Juan. But if any number of people could have been the third party, then they're not necessarily "special" or superior to the spouse; there're simply different―and the primary difference is just that they have the role of lover instead of the role of husband or wife. In most instances, the overall circumstances of the situation were much more important than the particular person involved. 

To be continued below...

Facing the most painful and devastating experiences, The Affair, you are not alone. Claimed as the Bible of The Affair, Dr. Bob Huizengaís Break Free from Affair gives you a step-by-step guide to help you break through the confusion, fear and move on with A Greater Life ahead. Break Free from Affair

The very nature of being the "third party" instead of the "spouse" means it's a fantasy relationship. When people are in affairs, they present a side of themselves that's not representative of the whole person. It's a special version of their best aspects, free from the normal responsibilities involved in sharing a total life situation; whereas the roles and structure of family life create many restrictions and responsibilities. A person's affair is not so much a rejection of the mate as a rejection of these role restrictions. This awareness can be especially helpful in dealing with our feelings of comparison with the third party. 

I personally found this perspective very helpful in dealing with my own feelings toward the third party. In my case, my husband had affairs with 15 different women. In some ways that seems overwhelming to get over; but on the other hand, it allowed me to avoid focusing on any one person. Instead, I was able to see that their importance was only in the role they played, not in the person who played it. 

Of course, this is much easier to do if the third party is rejected and the marriage survives. But even when a person does choose the third party over their spouse, they frequently learn much later (if the other person takes on the role of spouse) that their specialness had more to do with their earlier role than with the person themselves. Many people have an illusion that this new person offers a new life, only to discover after a few years that all the old feelings and issues are there just as in the past. They didn't really change games at all, they only changed the players. Today's third party may be tomorrow's spouse who is unhappy in their marriage.

To be continued below...

Is Your Partner Cheating Behind You Online?

Is your partner having an affair with someone online? Do you find that your wife is more and more indulged in the online world? You just donít know whatís going on, though your partner gives you a lot of excuses. But you can find the truth if online affair is the case. You can find a record of all the messages, emails your partner has sent, and you can review the record of every keystroke she has input. That is PC Pandora, which enables you to find out if she is having an online affair.

 

P.S. - Peggy Vaughan is a relationship expert, specializing in dealing with the issue of extramarital affairs. She reaches an international audience through her own Website at: http://www.dearpeggy.com  

Following is a list of readings that we recommend for you:

  1. Facing the most painful and devastating experiences, The Affair, you are not alone. Claimed as the Bible of The Affair, Dr. Bob Huizengaís Break Free from Affair gives you a step-by-step guide to help you break through the confusion, fear and move on with A Greater Life ahead. Break Free from Affair

  2. You can save your marriage TODAY! With impressive success rate of 90%, Dr. Lee's proven and effective approaches will rescue your marriage starting from today, and you could have the relationship of your dreams! Save Your Marriage... see what you think...

  3. I have found the effective 4-Step "strategy" to help you survive the relationship crisis, heal your broken heart and bring back your love. That is called Bring Back the Love of Your Life! I highly recommend it. See what you think...  Bring Back the Love of Your Life!

  4. How to have the GREAT SEX you can ever have in your life? How to have MULTIPLE orgasms you can have TONIGHT? How to make your partner crazy about you sexually? Killer Orgasm, we highly recommend.

  5. End Your Internet Porn Addiction- Do you suspect that your loved one is addicted to Internet pornography? What are the options for treatment? How to rebuild your life free from Internet porn? "Treating an Addiction to Internet Pornography" explains to you the answers for the above.

Recommended Readings:

Break Free From The Affair -a step-by-step guide to help you break through the affair, find how...

 

Bring Back the Love of Your Life! - You can mend your broken heart and bring back your lover! Find how...

 

Save Your Marriage

 

You could move from a marriage in trouble to the relationship of your dreams. More>>

 

 

 

 

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